Former Miss Teen USA Finalist In The News Again

By Style On The Dot on 31/08/2024

Thanks to JD Vance. Who is ex-beauty contestant Caitlin Upton, who famously flubbed at the finals of the popular American pageant?

Miss Teen South Carolina Caitlin Upton on stage at the finals of the Miss Teen USA in 2007. Screen shot: NBCNews/YouTube

In 2007, Caitlin Upton became instantly famous on the stage of Miss Teen USA of that year, but not by winning. She made national and international news, bungling her reply during the question-answer round of the competition. She was asked a simple question: "Recent polls have shown a fifth of Americans can't locate the US on a world map. Why do you think this is?" Her answer—convoluted as it was nonsensical—immediately gained her worldwide notice and mockery: "I personally believe that US Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some, uh, people out there in our nation don't have maps and, uh, I believe that our education like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and, I believe that they should, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., uh, or, uh, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future. For our children." The applause that followed was, at best, cordial.

Seventeen years later, Ms Upton's performance was brought to the attention of even more people when Donald Trump's running mate JD Vance, of the back-to-haunt-him "childless cat lady" scoff, shared on X a video of that competition interview in what appeared to be a juvenile attempt to mock Kamala Harris. The clip was accompanied by the message: "BREAKING: I have gotten ahold of the full Kamala Harris CNN interview." It is not clear why this juvenile act would enhance Mr Vance's appeal or credibility. Or, why Ms Upton, 35, who has had babies—two, in fact—is suitable in his aim at "women who think that truly the liberationist path is to spend 90 hours a week working in a cubicle at McKinsey instead of starting a family and having children", as he once said in a 2021 podcast. Callowness alone was not enough for Mr Vance. He had to trample on someone else's past to get to a person of the present.

Callowness alone was not enough for Mr Vance. He had to trample on someone else's past to get to a person of the present

Back in 2007, online reactions to Caitlin Upton's nonsensical answer on stage was not only swift, but brutal. Her segment was viewed on YouTube millions of times, with many saying that she was proof that the pageant bimbo was well and alive. And that she ticked every box that defined beauty with a bantam brain. The criticisms levelled at here were by both men and women. Ms Upton was given a chance to redeem herself when she appeared on The Today Show after the contest to re-answer the same question. The well-rehearsed and carefully-phrased reply she then gave was, to viewers, too corrective and inauthentic; they could not un-hear her original response. "Well, personally, my friends and I, we know exactly where the United States is on our map," she had said. "I don't know anyone else who doesn't. And if the statistics are correct, I believe there should be more emphasis on geography." No mention of cartographs.

When Ms Upton learnt about Mr Van's post, she commented on X: "It's a shame that 17 years later this is still being brought up. There's not too much else to say about it at this point. Regardless of political beliefs, one thing I do know is that social media and online bullying needs to stop." Strangely, she removed her musing not long after. Although she did not say anything about her political persuasion, it is believed that Ms Upton is a Republican. She is known to have supported Donald Trump; she was even a model signed to his agency Trump Model Management (later shortened to T Management) that closed in 2017 after the latter became the president. According to The Guardian, she "reportedly posted online about her support for Donald Trump's presidency, including his lies that voting fraudsters were responsible for his defeat to Joe Biden in the 2020 election". Could that explain why she deleted her X post? When Mr Vance was told on CNN that Ms Upton had suicidal thoughts after the Miss Teen USA flub, he said he did not know. And when asked if he would express regret for his action, he replied, chauvinism intact, "I'm not going to apologise for posting a joke."

Ms Caitlin in an editorial for Maxim in 2010. Photo: Maxim

Lauren Caitlin (also Caite) Upton was born in 1989 in Lexington, South Carolina. Nothing is known about her family. She grew up in Lexington and attended the local high school and then went to Appalachian State University in Boone, North Carolina. It is not certain what Ms Upton graduated in or if she graduated at all. Following the Miss Teen Universe blunder, she went on to become a model with the man who co-owns the Miss Teen USA, Miss USA and Miss Universe pageants. She described her first meeting with Donald Trump four days after the pageant to The Seattle Times in 2008: "When I walked into his office, he said, 'You are more gorgeous than I expected. You are going to model for my agency, and I won't take 'no' for an answer'." She fell for it and signed a few weeks later. Although she claimed that she desired to model in Spain, Italy and Australia, it isn't known if she did it or if she considered her modelling career a success. Two brands that engaged her were Nautica and Wrangler, but the appearances did not do for her what those for Guess did for Anna Nicole Smith, some fifteen years earlier.

Like many models without a steady career, Ms Upton tried other media requiring her talent. She appeared in American band Weezer's 2008 music video for the single Pork and Beans, spoofing her Miss Teen USA appearance, wielding a light saber! This was far from the 'Supers' starring in George Michael's fashion-heavy Freedom! '90. Two years later, she joined the cast of the 16th instalment of the reality series The Amazing Race. She dabbled in acting too, with roles in small, virtually unknown films, Funny or Die Presents (2007), Holliston (2012), and Neron (2016). In recent times, Ms Upton, married, is said to be selling real estate in Brentwood, Los Angeles. In the CNN interview, JD Vance said, "politics has gotten way too lame, way too boring. You can have some fun while making a good argument to the American people about how you're going to improve their lives." But he did not say how Caitlin Upton's life might meet with improvement after he had his fun with his cruel, callous jibe.