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Monday, February 19, 2024

Three Bits of Advice for Teenage Me

Jen and her cats posted: " Daily writing promptWhat advice would you give to your teenage self?View all responses . I grew up thinking that once I could escape my family of origin I would find a bright, shiny world where people lived well. When I finally did leave home I saw"
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Three Bits of Advice for Teenage Me

Jen and her cats

February 19

Daily writing prompt
What advice would you give to your teenage self?
View all responses

.

I grew up thinking that once I could escape my family of origin I would find a bright, shiny world where people lived well. When I finally did leave home I saw what a mess the world is in, but I believed that if we could all come together as the song said, we could make this a better place. Now I am an old woman who sees humans as an invasive species who think they know better than nature, and as a result we are headed toward extinction.

If I could give my younger self advice to make the ride easier, I'd pass on these three bits.

The rules are made up and are subject to change at any time

Protestant Americans in 1960 were concerned that if John F. Kennedy, a Catholic, was elected president, he would govern at the whims of the Pope. Fast forward 64 years to where we now have a United States Supreme Court made up of seven Catholics (six conservative, one liberal), one Jew, and one protestant. How'd public sentiment change? Evangelical Christian and Catholic leaders alike were pissed that in 1976 the Internal Revenue Service removed the tax-exempt status of Bob Jones University (a Christian college) because the school had rules against interracial dating and would not admit students of mixed race. Such religious folk have always felt their religious beliefs outweighed the rights of individuals (see proponents of slavery), so together they created The Moral Majority, a religious movement that would change the face of American politics and lead to today's abortion bans, laws restricting care for trans individuals, and vouchers to offset private Christian school tuition, among other things. See how easily the rules can be altered?

As individuals we have to decide to what extent we choose to conform or protest the rules before us. We are not all made of the stuff of Navalny, but we can act to make our world more inclusive and free from tyranny.

The world is a hot mess and you won't change that

There is far more dysfunction in this world than there are healthy systems and we who seek to live a sound life must learn to maneuver our way around the muck, or if we can't, through it.

Two days ago I alerted Instacart to a possible fraudulent transaction, and as a result I was accused of delivering to the wrong house, of not delivering at all, and of violating alcohol laws. I was called upon to justify my actions to the alleged perpetrator. It appears I was, for a time, limited in the types of work I could receive. And based on the behavior of the regulars in Publix, was the butt of malicious gossip.

This is the same way my family of origin functioned.

a gray tabby and white male cat in a loaf pose
Obligatory cat photo

.

Dysfunction happens our places of business; so far this month (that's 2 1/2 weeks, ya'll) the EEOC website reports they've settled with nine businesses to the tune of $2.885 million for discrimination cases involving race, gender, age, and/or disability. Today 29% of Americans report they are religiously unaffiliated, and clergy sex scandals and increased extremism are part of the reason why. Gallup Polling in March 2023 found that 49% of Americans saw themselves as politically independent, up from 31% in 2004. This shift is reportedly due to "the disillusionment with the political system, U.S. institutions and the two parties, which are seen as ineffectual, too political and too extreme." (Gallup analyst Jeff Jones)

So don't put your faith in groups. Don't give your all to jobs. Focus on you.

Despite all the crap, there is much to enjoy

This world is brimming with good things. It comes from those who seek peace and harmony within their own sphere. From those who share of themselves through their art, their music, their words. From those who refuse to accept the status quo and speak truth to power. I am drawn to these people like a moth to a flame. They have saved me many times just by being here.

I'm guessing if you read this far, you are of that category, which is why I like you so much. You make life tolerable. I'll be sure to tell my younger self to look out for you.

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