"How hot is it?" he asked, yawning.
"Too hot," she signed, unpacking her tote bag.
"It's all your fault. You humans ruin everything. You don't care either. Not about us, not about the planet, not even about yourselves. You're like a bunch of dead things letting a few people who are greedy, kill all of you and you do nothing to stop them because you're too busy shopping."
"Wow. Shopping?"
"It's a consumer society, right?"
"Summer school?"
"Maybe. But it's till true. No other animals need anything they can't get from the earth. You need chairs, houses, fans, clothes, purses, cars, tables, it's endless. You are the only living beings that need to have a billion things to be comfortable and survive. The only ones who are never satisfied."
"Anyway, what else is new?" she asked.
"The worst thing is how all of you let yourselves be treated. It's amazing to the rest of us. How many rich people are there that you can't stop them from doing the horrible things they do?"
"I brought you some new food. All the food in the US is poison, even cat food. Do you know bread is made out of human hair? It's disgusting. Eighty countries will not import our poisonous food. I'm thinking of moving all of you to a different country where there's some level of sanity."
"You better make sure she wins in November. The people interviewed for the other side don't speak in sentences. And how can anyone say that you all need to work together when there is no way that's going to happen. How do you compromise on freedom and slavery?"
"The sky is such a beautiful blue," she said, wistfully. "I hate to see summer go, but the flowers in the yard are starting to look tired and leaves are turning yellow and starting to fall."
"What happened to you?"
"What do you mean?"
"You're changing the subject and not furious about what's going on in the country."
"I'm tired."
"Well get untired because there's work to do."
"I don't think untired is a word."
"Like I care. I'm a talking cat, isn't that enough for you? Like every word out of your mouth is grammatically correct?"
"You're right. I'm sorry," she said, petting his tail.
"I guess you could look at it this way. Once you've destroyed everything you won't have to take an hour to get ready to leave the house. You know, that's another thing you animals do that no one else does. And we are cleaner than you are. All of this just proves what I said before. Your species is NOT from this planet. Nothing you do is positive for this place and you're always sick and dying and making a mess."
"I feed you and the others constantly."
"Okay, you're not all bad, but the cat food is poison, so you're actually killing us slowly."
"How did we get to this place?"
"You mean reality?"
She nodded.
"I read that people who don't pretend that reality is something other than it is, are unhappier than those who close their eyes and pretend. It was something like that."
"Someone pushed all the puzzle pieces off the kitchen counter last night. I was half way finished with it."
"That's what cats do. You know that. Why do you tempt us? You know how it's going to turn out."
"I guess I thought that just once..."
"Not going to happen. Put something over it next time. Like heavy glass table top, or something."
"You're making me massively depressed."
"You're making living beings extinct."
"I'm going to eat an entire chocolate easter bunny when I get home. It's dark chocolate. The ears are gone, but I put it in the freezer last year and I need a hit."
"It might elevate your mood but it won't solve the world's problems."
"It's candy. I have very low expectations as to what it can do."
"I saw you dancing in the kitchen last night. I think JJ liked it. She looked happy in your arms."
"She's a wonderful cat. She's beautiful and sweet. I'm crazy about her."
"Everyone likes her. But you don't like her as much as you like me, right?"
"Of course not."
He licked his paw and looked away. "Life doesn't have to be horrible. It's all about choices."
"And one species shouldn't be able to kill all the other species."
"Seems so simple, doesn't it?"
"Yes," she said. "It does."
"You realize that if society breaks down the underdogs will kill a lot of people. I can't blame them. Everyone is guilty. You've all been played from the very beginning."
"I know."
"You only know in the abstract. Your minds have been highjacked. Your thoughts aren't really your own. You've been brainwashed to see things a certain way and that way works to enslave you at every turn. Cats can see it because we can see everything and we aren't brainwashed, by parents who were indoctrinated, and pass down the master's wishes from generation to generation. We also don't go to schools, or believe in invisible gods and their religions. Religions that use fear and threats, as well as lies, to control your thoughts and behavior, while raping and pillaging for fun and profit. You never had a chance and, for the most part, all the other animals stop caring whether you're miserable or not, since they are all dying and the earth is in crisis. And it's all your fault."
"I'm going home and take a nap," she said, standing up.
"You don't nap."
"I know. I'd just rather not be awake anymore."
"How can you save the world, if you're asleep?"
She smiled at him, ran her hands over his warm body kissed him a hundred times, then turned and walked away.
He watched her go and wondered if he had said something to annoy her. Then he thought that a nap was a very good idea, so he curled into a ball and fell asleep.
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