"What?" he asked, watching her sit down.
"Why do you always say things like that? It's not very nice."
"Should I say you look like someone who is carrying a heavy suitcase and is ready to unpack it...on me?"
"That's just mean."
"We can talk about this stuff at night, when I'm at your place."
"No we can't, because when you're at my place you're rolling around in catnip or watching movies."
"And?"
"And it's hard to have a conversation when you're sleeping or running up the walls."
"Fine," he said, starting to eat "What's bugging you."
"Wow. I haven't heard that in a long time."
"A new guy moved in down the block and I heard him say that to his dog."
"How old is he?"
"The man or the dog?"
"Either one," she said.
"How should I know?"
"Here's my problem," she said. "I think evolution sucks. For humans, anyway."
"And why do you think that?" he asked, touching his dish, wanting more food. "Don't get me wrong. I mean I think you all suck, so I'm not arguing with you, just asking why you think humans didn't make the cut, that's all."
"You know how zebra's, horses, and well, pretty much EVERY animal is born and five minutes later they're running across the prairie, or the open plains?"
"I do know that."
"Even you can do almost everything in eight weeks."
"What do you mean even me?"
"I mean that everyone is so much more advanced than humans who have a brain that takes twenty-five years to mature. Why can't a baby stand up by three months, talk and go to school by the age of a one. Why can't their bones grow faster? Why can't they see better and why can't they grow up and not drag things out for years and years and years? It doesn't make any sense. What's the point? There's a girl who graduated from high school at seven. She went to college, got two degrees and is getting a master's in math and will be working for NASA. She wants to be an astronaut. There are other children like her, which proves that kids don't have to take a million years to learn. We can see that. We have PROOF. Her IQ is higher than Einstein's. His was 160 and her's is 162, so we KNOW kids can be intelligent so much earlier. So why is everyone forced to be a infantsfor half their lives? I think it's insane."
"I agree."
"You do?"
"Of course. Some of you never grow up at all. Everyone else knows there's something wrong with all of you. There's no reason for you to be born, half blind and unable to speak or stand up. No reason to take so many years to grow up. You spend your lives taking care of your kids until you're too old to take care of yourselves. By the time your kids leave, if they ever do, you're already ancient. And sometimes, like a bad movie, they come back. I'm surprised you're just finding this out. There is no reason you can't grow and be smarter earlier, other than the fact that you are a mistake, or someone is having a good laugh."
"Kids should grow faster and be smarter right away. Like zebra's."
"You couldn't possibly keep up with a zebra. Don't flatter yourself."
"And I don't believe that zebra's can run right away just because of predators. Humans have more predators than anyone. We ARE the predators," she said.
"Some kids are forced to grow up fast. Which proves that all kids could be more intelligent and able to do things if adults didn't get in their way. But why are we talking about this?" he asked, stretching.
"I just keep seeing glitches in the Matrix. Things that don't make any sense at all."
"You still don't realize the most important thing, do you. Your species, isn't actually from here. You were planted here, that's why you're different than everyone and everything else on the planet. You never were one of us. No one else needs clothes and beds and coffee and cars and glasses and...the never ending amount of things you constantly need to be comfortable, or to stay alive. Your garbage covers the earth and KILLS other beings. Garbage. No one else even has garbage. Just you. Truthfully, I can see why someone would dump you anywhere, just to get away from you."
"I can see that too."
"You add absolutely nothing to this planet. You only care about yourselves and what you can destroy next. Name one single thing that your species has done to make this planet better for other living things. Just one."
She thought. Then she thought some more. "I can't think of anything."
"You can't think of anything, because there isn't anything."
"You're right," she said. "We have done nothing but cause harm."
"To make matters worse, you compliment yourself for saving a species that wasn't in danger until you killed almost all of them. Humans cause horrible things that happen. By the way the dog's name is Chester. He's a golden. Seems okay. You know how golden's are."
"I do," she said, petting him. "I can't stop anything from happening."
"I know that."
"I'm sorry."
"I know that too."
"How's Jinx?"
"Great. He has a new girlfriend. Her name is Pinky. She's white with a pink nose. I like her. I think she'll be good for him. She has a great sense of humor and he likes to laugh, so, maybe she'll last longer than the others."
"I just want him to be happy."
"He is."
"How about you?"
"Mostly. I have a lot of responsibility, remember."
She nodded. "You do a great job."
"I know that."
She kissed him.
"Two of younger cats went home with people. "We check on them everyday and they seem to be well cared for."
"That's good, right?"
"Too soon to tell."
"Sorry about my ranting."
"You should know how terrible your species is. It's good to talk about it. It won't change anything, but it's good to talk about it.
"Thanks," she said, hugging him She kissed his face and shoulders, whispered sweet nothings into his ear, then stood up. "See you tonight?"
"We'll all be there."
"Sweet dreams."
"Always," he said, curling up, listening to her tip-toe away.
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