"Now what's wrong?" he asked, swishing his tail back and forth.
"Nothing. I mean, not really, it's just that..."
"Here it comes," he sighed, laying down.
"Do you think that when people get older they fall apart as a punishment for not dying?"
"What's wrong with you?" he asked. "Really. Who thinks of things like that?"
"I bet a lot of people think of things like that."
"I seriously doubt it," he mumbled.
"And all this stuff about the other side. What a joke that is."
"You have to stop researching death and just live your life," he said. "You're old. You'll find out about death soon. This is good food. What is it?"
"I don't know something with fish, I guess."
"Get more of it."
"They all make excuses for what the earth's like. To learn lessons. I just want to punch them in the face."
"Wow. You might just have a few lessons to learn."
"Don't care. Lies on both sides. All lies, manipulation and more of the same."
"Then don't die," he said, watching her put more food on his plate.
"Why would I want to stay here?"
"For me."
"I love you."
"I know. Isn't that what it's all about? Aren't we all one?" he said, sarcastically.
"No and no."
He snickered. "Figured that out, did you."
"Cat's know everything and are in touch with both sides, or as many sides as there are, so what's going on?"
"Why do you think we come here as cats? We come here as cats because no one in their right mind would choose to be a human being."
"I get that."
"You are the only species that thinks your special. Everyone else hates you because all you do is kill and eat them. You put their heads on your wall and leave their babies to die. You don't care about life, you only care about death. Who, or what you can kill next is the most important issue you have, even though all you are really doing is killing yourselves. You LOVE war. The rest of us just hope you finish up soon, so some of us can survive and be happy. Any titles you have, like brilliant, or this or that, you made up yourselves. No one else believes you're anything but deadly. So when you die, you simply step into another dimension and are immediately drugged, so that you don't start killing everything in the new place. They drug you with what they call love, to quell your violent natures and completely control you. They tell you it's free-will but you actually have no will at all. Still, you don't care because you love everything, so you're practically brain dead and floating in a sea of drugs doing what you're told to do."
"You are not helping me in the least."
"Hey, you asked."
"Fine."
"Coming to earth is coming to a dense, disease ridden, violent, impossible prison. The only exit is death. Everything about this place is about death, or trying to save something from death. It's a pretty place, but you kill that too. On the other side you get points for coming here. It's horrible here, you're cut off from everything, glued to a rock spinning through space and you have no idea what's actually going on. The funny part is that time here is bloody long. If you live on earth for a hundred years, it's only been ten minutes to those on the other side. So no biggie that you were locked in a closet for fifteen years and beaten twice a day. To them that was just a second or two. Anyway, they really sell earth, on the other side, because even thought things are supposed to be perfect on the other side, they tell you that you can be MORE perfect if you suffer."
"That doesn't make any sense."
"No kidding. So, everything here is set up to make you as miserable as possible. You know. A fun time. Nothing fits together. Men and women don't understand each other. The people and animals you love die, but you have guides and guardian angels who watch over you. They can't help you unless you ask and even then, they can only do so much because you SIGNED A CONTRACT before you came here and there's no going back on that. You HAVE to complete your mission. You die and want to stay on the other side, nope, they send you back because what you want never matters. You must complete your contract, even though you had no idea at all, what you were getting yourself into when you signed it, because you were lied to. So you you design your life plan, without knowing anything at all. Nothing. We, cats, and other animals, volunteer to come here to help you from going insane. It doesn't always work and our job is very hard. We were lied to as well, or we would have stopped coming here a long time ago. Some of you pick horribly difficult lives without having any idea of what that means. And once your here, you can't get out. You're trapped because even if you die, you can be sent back, as I said. Now, when you do die, you are such a mess from having been on earth, you have to be drugged, so you don't infect those on the other side with those pesky emotions. You don't want a mass murderer or rapist on that side, do you? Of course not. So you are overcome with feelings of love that you never felt before, since those feeling are NOT ALLOWED on earth. You are stripped of your humanness because it's gross, too ugly, and violent to be let in."
"This is like a horror story. I should write all of this down. I can add a vampire and other stuff to fill it out."
"Anyway, once you're on the other side, some can hardly wait to return and kill some more. When say kill I don't only mean kill physical things. You guys kill dreams and hopes, as well. No one knows what's actually going on because you are not allowed to know. Can I have more treats?
And then you have a life review, whether you want one or not because there is not free will at all. You see all the horrible things you've done since birth and all the good things too. You just see it from the point of view of the other people. Now here's where it gets really funny. Before you come here, you make deals with others. It's like a big play. So all the people around you are actors. So, if you ask someone to beat you, or abuse you, they have agreed to do that so that you can learn the things you wanted to learn by being tortured. This is the funny part. If you agree to HELP someone, by beating them, after they ASKED you to do so, you still have to see the pain THEY suffered at your hands, even though you never wanted to do it in the first place."
"I'm getting really tired," she said.
"There's more."
"I don't care. I've had enough."
"When all the animals you have loved die, because they were made to have short lives so you could learn what it's like to have your heart torn out of your body while you're still breathing, you get to know that they will be happily waiting to see you again, once you're dead. Meanwhile, have fun missing them for the time you have left on the planet. Another wonderful lesson."
"I brought you new catnip mice."
"If you die by accident and drift to the other side, you will be told to go back, since you supposedly have things to do on earth, even though you have no idea what those things are. Some dead people get to choose. If you aren't meant to stay on the other side, there's nothing you can do to stop them from sending you back, because no cares what you want to do. Free-will at it's finest. People who come back, after their visit are often massively depressed for years. Others are far too perky and filled with all the things that do not exist on earth. They are horrible to be around. Like when people stop smoking and want everyone else to do it too. The difference being that smokers actually have a choice, you don't. People tell others that what they saw and did, on the other side, but they can't really do so because THERE ARE NO WORDS to describe it. AND, those things DO NOT exist on earth, but you should feel it anyway and spread the love you are not allowed to have, all around. Pathetic."
"I'm going home," she said, loading her tote bag.
"Why?" he asked.
"You just drained my battery."
"You wanted to know. Cats and other animals know everything, that's why they can't speak to you. YOU aren't supposed to know anything. But then the internet came along and all the people who were too afraid to talk about their near death experiences are flapping their lips like there's no tomorrow."
"You sound like you're ninety years old."
"I've been here before. I just came back to help you."
"What?"
"I was your cat before. You asked me to come back with you. So I did."
"I love you so much," she said, kissing him. "But if this ever happens again, just keep biting and scratching me, until I stop being stupid. I'm sorry I asked you come here."
"It's okay. This is the first time you could understand me, so that's nice. That was part of your contract. Being able to understand what cats are saying."
"Do you know why I came here?"
"Yes, but I'm not allowed to tell you."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah. Just one more stupid thing. But if you knew why you were here, well, what's the point of any game, if you know how it's going to turn out?"
"I hate this whole set up and that's what it is."
"That's exactly what it is."
"What will happen if you tell me?"
"No idea. It's never been done."
"I wouldn't want you to get hurt," she said.
"Gee, how nice of you."
"I'm very grateful you came back with me, but if I'm ever insane enough to do this again, please don't sacrifice yourself for me."
"Yeah, yeah," he said, rolling over the catnip mice. "This is good stuff. Seems like we're all drugged no matter where we are."
"I'm always curious."
"And you can't have the answers."
"Because someone or someTHING is always running my life."
"Pretty much."
"Can I kill that thing?"
"No. It's just energy."
"Can I keep it away from me?"
"You're energy too. So am I. So is everything. So no."
"Is that the everything is one garbage?"
"Yup."
"Okay, here's what I want to know..."
"Hit me with it," he said, his eyes sparkling.
"There must be something that isn't energy, that exists. What is it, where is it, and what's it all about?"
"Everything has always been. Everything that could exists already does exist and it always has existed. That's important to know. Energy was always here but in the beginning you didn't have lightbulbs, right?"
"Right."
"So beings made out of energy, took the energy and put it into light bulbs, and computers. But it's still just energy. The same energy that's always been here. When the lightbulb burns out, the energy is still there. There are other places where they use energy differently. I don't really know about the dead zones because I'm made of the same energy as you are."
"We have been told that energy can't be destroyed. Is that true?"
"I've never heard of it happening but that doesn't mean that it's true. If energy can be destroyed, no one would tell us. Remember, we are all lied to all the time. We only know what we are allowed to know. If one knew how to destroy the energy that makes up EVERYTHING...what do you think would happen?"
"So it is a possibility?"
"More than likely."
"Interesting," she said. "So, in the end, we just go from one game to another."
"Yes, but remember, there are a lot of games happening at the same time and earth is simply the absolute worst one. Others are cushy and nice, or strange and too quiet. But you get bored all the time and then we end up back here, so you can be angry and pissed off again."
"You're saying you and I have done this more than twice?"
He laughed, and rolled onto his back. "More than twice," he snorted, laughing harder.
"Why would you let us do this?"
"Oh, so it's MY fault that you're stubborn and unreasonable?"
"Good point."
"I'm going to sleep."
"I'm sorry."
"You always are," he huffed.
"I'm sorry I drag you with me and I'm sorry I'm stupid enough to come here."
"Look at it this way," he said. "When people say, 'what's the worst thing that could happen,' you already know the answer."
She snickered. "Good one."
"Most people don't care about this stuff. You alway have to be weird. You never just do what the others do and just die."
"Sorry."
"You're like a dog with a bone."
"I know," she said, smiling at him. "I think you're my guardian angel made real."
"Took you long enough. Squashed into this tiny, but gorgeous, body, just to watch over you and you're NOT easy, you know," he said, looking away from her.
"I know. I'm sorry."
"Go home, so I can nap. I'll see you tonight. Try not to get hit by a car or run over by a bike okay. Get more of that food for tonight."
"See you later," she said, laying her face on his side. "I love you, I love you, I love you," she whispered, kissing him softly. She listened to him purr, then got up and tip-toed away.
"Humans," he muttered, curling into a ball.
Photo: Pixabay
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