Where I live in the UK, there is often something of a surge of new growth and energy around Beltain. Usually by this point in the year the trees are all in leaf and the ground-level greenery is rife. At the moment I'm seeing a lot of nettles and cleavers coming up, with archangels and dandelions in bloom. There's lots of bird activity - clearly nesting is well under way. Exactly when this upswing comes varies from year to year and will also depend on where you are.
There have been years when I've really struggled to keep up. I don't actively like winter, but at the same time, the cold and dark can get a substantial grip on my psyche and when all that new growth energy comes zooming in, I'm not always ready for it. This Beltain energy can be sudden and intense.
I've been doing better than average this year. I've found the cold spring odd - this is clearly another consequence of climate chaos and we just have to get on with it. Every weather weirdness is a reminder to keep trying, keep campaigning and speaking up and trying to create change. But day to day, we just have to live with what's going on as best we can.
Emotionally it's been a turbulent time for me, with a lot of challenges, and also a lot of opportunities. I've been doing a lot of inward facing work, getting to grips with some of my history and issues. That's inevitably been messy at times, but I feel like my roots are stronger than they were and that I'm ready for this season of flourishing and growth. I'm ready to stretch skywards and put out leaves, flowers, whatever else I turn out to have.
Flourishing and decay are all part of the natural cycles of life. When what's going on in your inner life aligns with what's going on in the world, that can really help you feel connected to the season. Of course it doesn't always work out that way. Life has its own tides and currents, for one, and for another we aren't plants and we don't necessarily respond to the seasons as if we were. Some of us wilt in the heat and thrive in the cold. Some of us are at our best around the softer equinox days.
It's always worth stopping to think about how your personal energies relate to the season. However, if you're not living the wheel of the year in terms of the shape of your life, there's no shame in that. Grief can come in high summer. We might find ourselves building in the autumn, not falling away. Once you start looking around however, it becomes apparent that the seasons are full of stories, and that there probably is some other kind of being whose experiences parallel yours.
This year I feel like a coppiced wood, cut back hard in the dark part of the year, and coming back into new growth. Some years it has felt like I was the last thing to leaf. If nothing else, relating to the wheel of the year is a way of holding the space for change. Nothing stays the same forever, and whatever life brings right now you can be sure it will bring something else in the future. The aim of connecting isn't to try and be in control of what's happening, nor - I think - to try and make your inner life follow the shape of the seasons. Instead, I think what we get from connecting with the changing seasons, is being more open to change and better able to flex with whatever comes, be that a cold spring, or a massive personal shift.
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