Thank you to Simon & Schuster for the early copy. Title: Dinner for Vampires: Life on a Cult TV Show
Author(s): Bethany Joy Lenz
Rating: 5 stars
Release Date: October 22nd, 2024
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Genre(s): Memoir, Nonfiction
Synopsis:
A deliciously witty and inspiring memoir by One Tree Hill star Bethany Joy Lenz about her decade in a cult and her quest to break free.
In the early 2000s, after years of hard work and determination to breakthrough as an actor, Bethany Joy Lenz was finally cast as one of the leads on the hit drama One Tree Hill. Her career was about to take off, but her personal life was slowly beginning to unravel. What none of the show's millions of fans knew, hidden even from her costars, was her secret double life in a cult.
An only child who often had to fend for herself and always wanted a place to belong, Lenz found the safe haven she'd been searching for in a Bible study group with other Hollywood creatives. However, the group soon morphed into something more sinister—a slowly woven web of manipulation, abuse, and fear under the guise of a church covenant called The Big House Family. Piece by piece, Lenz began to give away her autonomy, ultimately relocating to the Family's Pacific Northwest compound, overseen by a domineering minister who would convince Lenz to marry one of his sons and steadily drained millions of her TV income without her knowledge. Family "minders" assigned to her on set, "Maoist struggle session"–inspired meetings in the basement of a filthy house, and regular counseling with "Leadership" were just part of the tactics used to keep her loyal.
Only when she became a mother did Lenz find the courage to leave and spare her child from a similar fate. After nearly a decade (and with the unlikely help of a One Tree Hill superfan), she finally managed to escape the family's grip and begin to heal from the deep trauma that forever altered her relationship with God and her understanding of faith. Written with powerful honesty and dark humor, Dinner for Vampires is an inspiring story about the importance of identity and understanding what you believe.
My Review:
Dinner for Vampires is already my favorite memoir of the year! Bethany Joy Lenz pours her soul into this book and you can feel it in her writing because it's so raw and vulnerable. In her memoir, she talks about her time in a cult, not for the simple purpose of showing you how naive she felt, but to show the importance of knowing yourself, sticking to your own morals/values, and realizing your own strength. Since the moment I first watched One Tree Hill and met Haley James Scott on screen, I became a fan and after reading her memoir I am an even bigger fan of hers because you get to see her as more than a celebrity/actress/singer you get to see her heart. Her kindness, love for others, and positivity shine brighter than all of the darkness!
I remember it like it was yesterday. I was a freshman in high school and caught a stomach bug. I stayed home from school and was lying in bed. At my mom's plea to eat something, I got up and ate some soup while watching the SoapNet channel and stumbled upon an episode of One Tree Hill. It was halfway through a rerun(probably an episode from season 2) and I was hooked. Haley James Scott quickly became the character I felt that I could relate to the most. I knew this show was going to be good and I begged my mom to buy me the DVDs because I couldn't continue to watch season 2 when I didn't even watch season 1. (Yes this was a time before streaming) I sped through the season and was all caught up and I never missed another episode. In my eyes, Bethany Joy Lenz had it all. She seemed cool and down-to-earth and was obviously super talented. She was a great actress, a beautiful singer, and again just seemed so cool. All this to say, I am a huge fan of hers. And when I heard that she was coming out with a memoir I knew I had to read it!
I started to read the first few chapters and was stunned. I didn't expect all the rough parts she had to go through. She gave so much happiness and joy to her fans and to know that she cried most days and had people who 'loved' her being the same people to make her question herself and tear her down when they saw fit, made my heart shatter.
From the beginning, you can see how big she dreamt. She wanted to be an actress and sing on Broadway and knew her hard work would take her there. And to see her achieve it had me bursting with joy. On the other side of it, I felt sad to see her turn down roles, distance herself from possible lifelong friendships,and shy away from passion projects because others convinced her that it was best for her relationship with God.
You learn quickly about how she became part of The Big House Family, the cult that she was in for a decade. It gave her little but took so much from her. While some might say, "Oh, only weak or naive people can fall into or be persuaded to be in a cult" that is just not the case. Bethany shows you her experience so that you can see that anyone can be wrapped up in the world and most of the time you don't even see it coming. In her case, she became introduced to the leaders when she moved to L.A. in her twenties to pursue her acting career. Bethany had always grown up in Bible study having a strong faith. Her roommate at the time introduced her to the leaders. How awesome was it? She already made a new friends who shared her faith. But what she didn't know what that was the beginning of her decade long journey of being a member of cult. All this while filming one of the most popular series. She describes how that had an impact on her seclusion and loneliness from cast members and how she wished she could have embraced connection and friendship. In one instance, she describes meeting Sophia Bush and having a instant connection. She felt comfortable in that moment and that was a trigger that brought up her past. Because of that she closed the door for a chance at a budding friendship and how she wished she could turn back time. She also details how she was captivated by the group, how their inner systems worked, and how she lost her autonomy in her every day life. From long meetings in a basement where you were told everything you were doing wrong, to being controlled in your personal and professional life, ultimately leading to an arranged marriage full of toxicity. It shocked me in a way that made me sad and angry but it made me have so much more respect and admiration for Bethany. This woman was told what to do, when to do it, when to stop. She cried so many tears, felt confused, and when she had a gut feeling about something being wrong she was quickly convinced that she had to go through the harsh times because it was all in God's plan. I can't even imagine going through it, but she had the strength to escape. And that's thanks to her daughter. When Bethany had her daughter Rosie, she was finally able to see these so called 'faithful leaders' (including her ex husband) for what they were: controlling, demeaning, and destructive. They took so much from her; they took away potential friendships, jobs, true love, time with loved ones, and her autonomy, leaving her with scars that will never go away. Now, what is so special about Bethany is that once these revelations came to light she didn't hide she fought! She fought for her dignity, for her daughter, and fought for their future.
After I finshed the book, I realized how fitting the title 'Dinner for Vampires' is. She sat down and spent 10 years of her life with this 'family' and when she didn't agree or appease their wishes anymore, the fangs came out ready to sink into their next victim. To realize her strength and love for herself and her daughter left me finishing the book with the biggest smile. This memoir was like reading a journal that your best friend wrote throughout her life. Yes, there were alot of bad times, but the good moments helped make it easier to move forward. Bethany Joy Lenz's Dinner for Vampires was simply unputdownable! It isn't easy to open up your life, let alone open up about your darkest times to the world, but her vulnerability was the best part. She wasn't afraid to put it out there especially if it helps someone else! I truly applaud her for showing us her heart!
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